Monday, April 28, 2008

Changes

A lot has been said recently about all the rules we, evangelical Christians, lived by in the 40’s, 50’s, 60’s, 70’s and even moving into the 80's. I’m not sure when it started but I was a little girl in the 40’s and my parents became born again Christians in about 1941, so I’ll begin there. I'm not saying they were right or wrong, I'm just looking back and telling my experiences. First of all I’ll list the no-no’s: make-up; jewelry; movies; dancing; roller skating in a rink; playing pool; bowling; mixed swimming; smoking; drinking; playing cards; gambling; buying on Sunday; eating out on Sunday, reading the newspaper on Sunday, playing sports on Sunday and working on Sunday; instrumental music in the church! Now let me comment on some of these. Make-up: for some reason we were allowed to wear powder on our faces! A shiny nose was unbecoming! In the 50’s some missionary wives began to wear wedding rings because in some (most) countries men watched for women without wedding rings thinking they were available! Once missionary wives began wearing wedding bands pastor’s wives took up the new freedom! I remember when my mom wore her first wedding ring as a ‘Christian’. I became engaged in the late 50’s and was told by my parents not to accept a diamond ring, so Jerry bought me a beautiful wrist watch! Wedding rings were the norm when we were married in ‘59. We weren’t allowed to go to movies, not because they were bad, but because the money we would have spent for tickets would be used by Hollywood where life was anything but Christian. Music played in a roller rink was not music Christians should listen to, and it was too much like dancing if a couple skated together, also there was drinking and smoking going on. Pool was played in a hall where there was drinking and smoking. Bowling, same as pool. Mixed swimming was too suggestive. Smoking - drinking, both bad for health. YES! Playing cards was associated with gambling. Gambling was and is addictive and a waste of money. Buying, eating out, and reading the newspaper all on Sunday meant someone had to work on Sunday to have these available to us. Piano’s began coming in churches in the late 40’s and early 50’s. Personally, I have never understood this rule since there are so many Psalms telling us to praise God with musical instruments!
However, I believe the leaders in the church had our best interest at heart. I didn’t resent the rules like some of my peers. I can’t explain why, I just didn’t. To this day I can’t bear to have a deck of cards in my house. It was so taboo in my childhood I’m still affected by the feelings of shame when I see them. Please don’t ridicule me, try to understand me. I went to a drive-in theater when I was in 10th grade, a couple of times, with my boyfriend (we stayed in the front seat!) because we thought we had nothing else to do. I asked my mom, when she questioned me, if she would rather we ‘parked’ since we had no where else to go! She didn’t give me an answer. Once a month, when I was a teenager, we had church night at the skating rink. The music was secular but it was slow and mellow. The movies we couldn’t watch were ‘good’ movies! The first movie we went to see as a family was Sound of Music. We were visiting my sister’s family and they took us! (I’m playing the blame game here!) It's still my favorite movie today! Most movies, today, are so full of bad language, sex, and violence, I have to question, in my mind, what Christians do when they go to the movies! Do they just sit there and accept it as life today? Do they get up and walk out? I never hear of anyone walking out!
In 10th grade I went to a school dance after a football game one night. We won the game and my friends and I were feeling so high, and they were going to the school dance so I went with them. I stayed back in the shadows and watched, thinking no one would see me. Suddenly, everyone was lining up to do the ‘bunny hop’! Oh, I loved the ‘bunny hop’. I joined in, what would the harm be? We danced all around and around. Finally it ended and I went back to stand in the shadows. All of a sudden I heard my name over the loud speaker! “Anita — please come up to the band to pick up your wallet!” My wallet? It’s right here in my pocket. Oh no, it’s not here, it must have fallen out while I was dancing the ‘bunny hop’. Oh no, now everyone knows I’m here. Everyone knows I don’t dance, now they know I did! I walked slowly up to the band and admitted I had lost my wallet. After identifying myself it was given to me and I sheepishly walked back to the shadows until my friends were ready to go home. Oh, such guilt I felt! Actually, I wasn’t very well known! I went to a large high school in a large city, I was a lowly sophomore. I wasn’t popular. Who cared if I was there? But I never went to a dance again and, in fact, the next two years I went to a Christian high school. Problem solved! For several years Jerry and I were the youth workers here in our church. We worked hard to make an alternative special evening for the teens, especially the seniors, at prom time. We put on a senior banquet, renting a hall,
having special music with musicians, having a special speaker to challenge the kids, etc. It was a dress-up night, one they would remember as special, just for them. Today, at least in our town, everyone goes to the prom! It doesn’t matter who is a Christian and who isn’t. Prom night is the big night. The girls even come to church on Sunday wearing their skimpy gowns! I can’t believe it! Oh, how things have changed. Most changes are okay. Social drinking is now acceptable. We've adjusted to most of them. I wear make-up and jewelry. This will be way, way too long if I list all the ways we've changed, but there are some ways we've not changed, we've stood firm and have grown spiritually along the way.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (legalism). Galatians 4:23

“Everything is permissible”—but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible”—but not everything is constructive. I Corinthians 10:23

Remember the Sabbath Day to keep it holy. Exodus 20:8

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are feeling very nostalgic! I am enjoying these memories of yours - thanks for sharing.

ruth said...

Anita
Even though I'm only 37 years old I grew up in a strict Free Methodist home and taking Lauren to a dance this past week seemed really foreign. The truth is without me even saying a word God spoke to her heart and made her uncomfortable with some of the stuff going on and I don't think the whole idea of going to a "dance" has quite the allure it used to have and that's only in
5th grade. I am glad we can eat out on Sunday's now, even my parents enjoy doing that these days which would've been a strict no no when I was growing up :). I just read through the book of Galatians so when I saw your verse it resounded with what God had been speaking to me about in my own heart. We Christians should be the freest people on the planet...don't you think.
Love,
Ruth

Kate said...

Anita we have such similar backgrounds...we will have to discuss this further!!!